Friday, June 29, 2007
After A Long Respite...
Its be quite a while since I posted something here...
Anyway, my mood is a bit dark today.... so...
(its not representative of my current situation...)
In the Rain -- by -Emptiness-
We sat beside the window pane, listening
To the sound of the torrential rain, falling
As we slowly sipped our tea.
It’s been so long since I’ve heard you, speaking
Those sweet promises of love forever, fading
Into the noise of the pounding rain.
Closing my eyes, I felt a raindrop, slipping
Down my parched skin, thirsting
For a touch from your crimson reds.
In the midst of the storm I heard it, dripping
As I turned down my eyes, looking
And in the watery reflection, distorted by gentle ripples
There was a haggard man,
Crying
- Emptiness - 6/29/2007 06:02:00 pm
Friday, June 16, 2006
For My Darling...
From Now Until Forever
I’ve never known a love like yours
Nor thought it could be true,
But every time I kiss your lips
I feel what love can do
With auburn hair like threads of silk,
And lips sweeter than wine,
I knew my life was not in vain,
The day I made you mine.
But now and then, we have our tiffs,
That lovers always do.
I always try to act so cool,
Not knowing I’m a fool.
If there’s one thing I’ve learnt from these -
I must forgo my pride,
For I couldn’t live, and couldn’t breathe
Without you by my side.
Without the beating of your heart,
Without your silent breaths,
Losing my love, my guiding light,
I’d die a thousand deaths.
And never will I let you go,
Despite time’s searing sands.
No matter where, no matter when,
I’ll hold on to your hands.
For in my heart you’ll always be,
My love, my one romance,
- Emptiness - 6/16/2006 02:38:00 pm
Friday, June 02, 2006
A long interlude...
As they say, those who are in a relationship hardly have time for other things...
I can vouch for this...
I hardly have time for friends, blogs, whatever, that I used to spend lots of time on... haha... I guess it's just a trade-off that many have to bear with... I wonder how those people who are in a relationship manage to have time for anything else... But I'm not complaining ;)
It's so hard to just find 1 person who can understand you, who cares for you, who is able to put up with you when you are in a bad mood and tries to cheer you up, who is willing to put aside her fear and walk with you into the unknown, who is prepared to face the consequences and troubles that being with you might have...
But I've found such a person... Though she might not say all these, explicitly, I know all too well that this is what her heart is saying all the time... And even she might not know it too...
FlightMemories fly by,
As I gently close my eyes,
Dreaming of you.
The painful past,
A nightmare of vengeful lust,
Bounded your soul.
Shadow of fear,
Grasped hold as you dropped a tear,
You turned and ran.
That moonlit night,
Finally I stopped your flight,
And pulled you close.
Whisp’d in your ear,
That you’d never have to fear,
Be mine, my dear.
~*~*~
We’ve traveled so far, and been through so much,
Through quarrels and fights, through kisses and hugs,
And all these my dear, just strengthened our vows,
To stay true to forever, hands locked together
As we stroll into the future.
- Emptiness - 6/02/2006 09:48:00 am
Thursday, January 26, 2006
Dreams
When I was young, my mum once told me,
"Son, when you grow up you'll do great things"
Like all the other children, I starting building my castle of marbled hallways,
And sumptuous feasts, up in the air where my daydreams lay.
Day by day, my towers rose, till I thought I could see,
The whole wide world from my lofty perch.
But jealousy runs, even in the impartial gods,
Who from afar sent out their clouds,
Of terror and gloom to wreck my world.
Huddled within, as lightnings flashed,
I watched on as the sturdy walls cracked,
My handcrafted dreams, of my childhood days,
Now, just a heap of trash.
- Emptiness - 1/26/2006 10:47:00 pm
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Fragments of Emotions
Sorrow / Anguish
Destitute -- by -Emptiness-Teardrops rain down from the sky,As he tries to drown himself in wine.Once life was his own design,Now he see he then was blind.Living Memories -- by -Emptiness-Again the moon was veiled by the clouds.As we walked along the beach tonight,I squinted as I tried to trace,The trails our footprints made last night,Weaving through the scattered rocks.But tonight, there is only one.Strolling beside, I led you along,As we walk the same old path tonight.Though my throat is sore, from a sleepless night of tears,Just like the day before, we shouted my vows into the oceanBut tonight, there is only one.As the dawn began to break,We turned towards the rising sun,A blissful picture of a pair ofSilhouettes gazing into the sunrise.But today, there is only one.Hopeful / Joyous
Wishing Well -- by -Emptiness-In each of our hearts, there is a well,Where we toss our little pennies,Of hopes and dreams wishingOur dreams will come true.Once too I used to toss little pennies,Of sweet dreams and high hopes.But I've since sealed my wishing well,The day I found you.Just a few poems in my hp =)
Anyway, it has been a hectic term... tuition, tutorials, blah blah... and it's coming to an end already! Never thought half a year would speed by so quickly... It's much like a passing dream... But I'm throughly enjoying every moment of it... To all you out there who's starting to get stressed by exams... don't fret! It'll all be over in just awhile... And we can all heave a sigh of relief =) Just a few more days of mugging that's all =) kk... till next time then! =P
- Emptiness - 11/09/2005 02:15:00 am
Friday, October 07, 2005
A Promise...
Solitaire -- by -Emptiness-
Crossing my fingers,
I whisper a prayer,
That forever,
We'll stay a pair.
And when you're afraid,
Caught up by despair,
I promise you this,
I'll surely be there.
To be your strength,
When nobody cares.
Such that never again,
Will you play solitaire.
I wonder why I post such poems here when she doesn't come here... -_"- ...
Anyway, what's wrong with NUS? They changed the stupid academic calender, and caused me not only to miss a tutorial without knowing it... because i didn't know it, i came on the wrong week just to realise that there actually isn't any tutorial... cause I already missed it... wat the... what's wrong with those guys?
Anyway, it's been a long time since I posted anything here... Haven't had the time for much things recently... tuition, school, her, tuition, school, her... what the... I'm so busy... Reminicing on those days before I knew her, 1st sem NUS... Seems so much like a dream... the nightly supper with my supper pals... the late nights of TV / internet chat / computer games / whatever else that comes to mind... hours spent trying to draw portraits to improve my drawing... my (failed) attempt at learning japanese through reading japanese comics... Gazing blankly into the silent night at the balcony, relishing in its serenity and calm... Life seems so different now...
But it's another type of enjoyment... spending it with the one you love... but at the same time, feeling terrible when you don't get to see her... feeling you can love her forever when on good terms... feeling that you hate her when you quarrel with her... Life seems so much more dramatic now... but still, I love this, and wouldn't give it up for the world... =)
Anyway, since I have no tut now, and am free till my tuition at 1.30pm... I'll see if I can go meet her now =)... i'm drooling hehe... Took some time off to write this post... hmm... wonder if she'll kill me for that hehe... but just a few min... not even 10 =)...
Till the next time i'm free =)
- Emptiness - 10/07/2005 10:12:00 am
Tuesday, September 06, 2005
A little something
Though the night wind might be cold,
And the silence chills my soul,
There's a place where I can go -
In my dreams where you I hold...
- Emptiness - 9/06/2005 01:13:00 am
Thursday, September 01, 2005
A nice photo I found...
A silhouette along the beach;
Our sand-crusted feet
Molding footprints side by side,
Concealed behind the veil of night.
A wave breaks on the sleeping shore;
The rushing foam we both ignore;
As our whispered vows of love,
Are whisked by cupid’s arrow to the clouds above.
Our future I see, in your teardrop eyes,
Shiny jewels that I immortalize.
Never did I guess;
In that silent moment,
I could have been blessed with
A glimpse of heaven.
- Emptiness - 9/01/2005 02:19:00 am
Sunday, August 21, 2005
Lighter moods...
Hmm... I guess this blog is getting a little too moody.... so here's something I wrote while drifting away in uni lectures... not that good, but who cares? Haha... I guess many others can identify with it though....
Dozing off - by -Emptiness-
My eyes are red,
And my body aches.
All that I see,
All look like beds.
The dim white lights,
Her droning voice;
I'm drifting away,
Into a world of joys.
Why tap my arm?
Did you call my name?
Pardon me, my dear,
What were you saying again?
Authors comments: About a guy falling asleep during econs lectures, where the lecturer will actually pick on those people who are falling asleep... And his friend trying to tap him up when he realises that the lecturer has noticed his sleeping friend... You can guess who that someone falling asleep is.... haha....
- Emptiness - 8/21/2005 02:23:00 am
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
One Sided Love Affair - by -Emptiness-
My spirit's laid before her bare,
But does she even care?
True is my love, I can declare,
But to her I'm just a spare.
A person for her to shout and flare,
But lean on when in despair.
Her deepest thoughts she wouldn't share,
Though I've already laid mine bare.
I don't give a damn if she is fair,
So much that people turn and stare.
All I want is for her heart to swear,
That she'll love me beyond compare.
Never in my sincere prayer
Did I ask for such a mare.
How did we even end up as a pair,
In this one sided love affair.
I personally think I'm rather confused.... so just close an eye on this one...
- Emptiness - 7/26/2005 05:49:00 pm
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
Walking blind -- by -Emptiness-
Darkness
I strain my eyes
Who put down the blinds?
Walking blind
Gingerly
Cautious steps
Someone to lead me, perhaps?
Walking blind
Outstretched
Searching hands
Who knows fate’s malicious plans?
Walking blind
Anxiety
Cold and alone
Will I emerge unscathed from the unknown?
- Emptiness - 7/19/2005 07:49:00 pm
Thursday, July 14, 2005
Cruel Fate
Love and Hate -- by -Emptiness-
Love and hate,
Two sides of a sharpened blade.
A blade that cuts a
Path through the tangled
Vines which guard the inner
Souls of lonely hearts.
A blade that pierces
Resilient spirits and
Leaves hearts in pieces that
Can never be fixed.
Love and hate,
The path is narrow and never straight.
A rugged path full
Of excitement and
Pleasure to the
Senses for virgin hikers.
A rugged path, with
Dangers lurking ready
To pounce upon
Unsuspecting adventurers.
Love and hate,
Tied together by a cruel twist of fate.
Dangling it’s pleasures before you like a bait,
You’ll never know it until it’s too late.
- Emptiness - 7/14/2005 03:09:00 am
Monday, July 11, 2005
Assorted Poems
Depths of Time -- by -Emptiness-
Oh angel of mine,
We both are one of a kind.
Hurt and forsaken,
For granted we've both been taken.
But wallow not in the past,
For the pain's just temporal and won't last.
Cause I'm here now to hold you tight,
Throughout the cold and lonely night.
I'll bury all these hurts of thine,
Deep in the depths of time.
Witnessed -- by -Emptiness-
Under the moonlit night,
Cuddled with my life's delight.
Whispering our vows of love,
Witnessed by the heavens above.
Lady in Red -- by -Emptiness-
Oh lady in red,
Why are you sad?
It was your choice,
To play with his heart.
Oh lady in red,
Why do you cry?
It was your words,
That tore up his heart.
Oh lady in red,
Why do you care?
You brushed him aside,
And left him for dead.
Oh lady in red,
Why do you fear?
You shelter and strength,
You despised and maimed.
Oh lady in red,
Why do you scream?
It's all in the past,
Now just a dream.
- Emptiness - 7/11/2005 02:45:00 pm
Sunday, July 10, 2005
Secret Garden....
I Realise -- by -Emptiness-
Is it really just a year or two?
It seems so long since we’ve been through.
The hours which then used to fly,
The rules of time they now defy.
The joy of life, gone with the night,
With escape nowhere near in sight.
The colors which then lit my world,
With my heart, eloped with my girl.
How could we have turned out so?
Two hearts so close, but now so cold.
The passion of love, I felt that July,
Now replaced by the cold wind’s sigh.
Gazing at the fallen snow,
I realize that I miss her so.Wasn't really in the mood for poetry today... at first, just logged on to see who's online... then saw someone's nick "I miss him so"... At that time, I was listening to Secret Garden... 'Song from a Secret Garden'... And I knew I just had to write a poem...
- Emptiness - 7/10/2005 10:29:00 pm
Monday, July 04, 2005
Cough cough...
Damn... my whole body hurts... Been coughing for a week exactly now... started last sunday with a bad sore throat I noticed while giving tuition... now, coughing so badly that I'm having headaches, stomach crams, toothaches, hunger pangs... all due to this coughing... Didn't know coughing could be this bad... Reminds me of the time I got pneumonia during my BMT days... super super sianz... It's not that bad yet... but I've absolutely no intention of letting it progress to such a stage... Help! Someone!
Worse of all, not only am I affected, my dad is affected too... coughing so loudly he can't sleep properly too.... -_"- ...
Not my fault hor....
Stupid weather.... Blame it all on the weather... =P
- Emptiness - 7/04/2005 02:01:00 am
Thursday, June 16, 2005
Reflections under the moonlight
Night
A time when everything suddenly hits you.
"What am I doing here?"
"What's the meaning of life?"
"What am I living for?"
Lots of questions, no answers. We're just insignificant, wandering souls, going about with our own agendas, of which is probably questionable.
"I want to be rich! I want to earn lots of money! I also want to get a good job, have a sense of achievement, be recognised and famous."
And then? You'll buy a big car, a big house, eat expensive food, go on long holidays, and at the end of the day, have a really big, elaborate funeral, where a lot of people come to pay their last respects.
But you are already dead.
"I want to experience life, it's thrills and excitement. I want to see places, explore the frontiers of space."
And then? So what? After you've seen them, does it make a difference? Enriched your life did you say? Ahuh... It's just memories of the past. That's all it will be. At the end of the day you'll join those before you buried 6 feet underground. Or have your ashes stored in a little shelf somewhere around Mt. Vernon.
"I want to have a stable, close knitted, loving family, with a dotting husband / devoted wife, and lots of adorable kids."
Considering how fragile human relationships are, how long can it last for? Today lovers, tomorrow enemies. And even if you manage to do what 99% of the people fail to do, and pull off this stunt, 40-50 years down the road, someone will have to go. So much for your happy family. Pain is all that is left. Pain and happy memories, which will bring only more pain when you dwell back on them.
Wow. What a beautiful picture. Meaningless.
So what are we living for? I scan the stars in search of an answer. And this thought sure does serve a terrifying purpose of destroying any shred of happiness...
- Emptiness - 6/16/2005 10:56:00 pm
Tuesday, June 07, 2005
Some poem I wrote...
Fallen Angel -- by -Emptiness-
Oh my angel, how you have fallen from grace,
Cast down from the heavens, from your rightful place.
Your innocence lost, that can never be replaced,
Given for a chance at love, that has gone to waste.
Oh my angel, how you have been mislead,
By the beautiful lies that, to you he has fed.
Have you yet to see through the web of deceit he shed,
Or are you just grabbing hold to love’s last feeble thread?
Oh my angel, how you have lost your faith,
Betrayed and forsaken by a heartless knave.
Your heart he buried, in a nameless grave,
Lost forever, where no one can save.
Oh my angel, how you have been tormented,
By his cruel words, that left you devastated.
Every night you roamed the streets, lost and defeated,
Like a penniless bankrupt, who has just been evicted.
Oh my angel, how you have cried in pain,
Wondering why you have given all, but all in vain.
You’ve tried your best, to wash off this stain,
But still have yet to cast off this chain.
Oh my angel, how your tears have dried,
The streams that you thought, would never subside.
His hold on you, finally thrown aside,
No longer do you need to run and hide.
Oh my angel, how you have stood again,
Like the flower which blossoms after the rain.
Emerging unscathed, from the blazing flame,
Hardened, strengthened, no longer the same.
Oh my angel, how you have been changed,
Your innocence, for reality, has been exchanged.
Barred from the heavens, for which you once campaigned,
Accepting that some things in life, are just preordained.
- Emptiness - 6/07/2005 09:59:00 pm
Sunday, May 29, 2005
Who will defend us?
Left right left right left right.....
After going 'AWOL' for just more than a year, the army has finally got it's butt to dragging me back into camp... So much for my little holiday... 5 days of hell again I guess (300505 to 030605)-- grumpy cooks, flustered sergeants, retarded officers, substandard food, brainless activities.... ya.... I have to agree that our army one of the best, if not the best in Asia... Walking around the little 'jungles' of Singapore, no bigger than our own mandai zoo, with heavy packs, and dummy rifles, talking in gibberish code on the army's version of the hand phone, which is about 100 times the weight (10kg++) of our commericial handphones... Ya... Our army is the most efficient... no doubt about it...
Reminds me about the other time I got dragged back to camp.... for a one day event... went there and guess what we did... 'bonding sessions' with the rest of the guys, whom I have been around thru my army life... for the entire day!.... gimme a break dude... I've spent 2 1/2 years in forced bondage to the army, and after which, have tried so darn hard to unbond myself... We went there and played ice breaker games, listen to some old folk with a few insignias on his shoulder tell us about life as a reservist, trying to make it sound as if it is such an exciting milestone in our lives, to be able to give of our lives to the army, to Singapore...
Just another thought... reminds me of those silly army adverts you see on tv... 'who will defend us?.... they are our army...' oh please... Anyone who has been thru NS will know that that is just a bunch of bull... the army has enough problems trying to protect itself from itself... Before we even set of for a mission, the entire sick bay, or medical center, as they call it, will be filled to the brim with enthusiastic personnel awaiting some form of excuse from training, be it sprained leg, tummy aches, sore eyes, back ache, or the most common 'not feeling well'... Before we even set one foot off camp, our numbers will be down to half our original size... Not only that, the army has no lack of overzealous, 'garang' officers, who have more brawn than brains.... 'Charge charge!!!!' and after around 10mins of running like bunnies in the heat, he finally realised that...
We are lost.... -_"-
And worst of it all, is that he doesn't admit it... Saying... 'Just follow our course... we'll link back to the main group in no time.... ya right... idiot... next thing we know, we're beside some road at the bus stop, looking at the map again to try and figure out where we are...
Anyway, pray that I don't lose whatever brains I've managed to gather back from that 2 1/2 year stint in there.... I really do need my 'A's... 3rd June quickly come....
- Emptiness - 5/29/2005 05:51:00 pm
Monday, May 23, 2005
Alcoholic Inspiration...
Yy says that alcohol is supposed to give u inspiration... so I guess this is my little experiment... However, I don't think this makes much sense or has much link... Feeling a little tipsy from the alchohol... Hope it is still readable and understandable....
What is love? -- by -Emptiness-
What truly is love?
Is it really something divine that comes from above?
Why then does it hurt so badly?
So badly I haven’t slept at all lately?
What truly is love?
Beautifully packaged lies are all that I observe.
Have we really been deceived,
By those stories of selfless sacrifices we’ve believed?
What truly is love?
Is it really pure and innocent like a dove?
From all that I’ve seen,
It’s just lust and desires disguised, perverted and obscene.
What truly is love?
Is it the biological stimulation of some cranial nerve?
Why then is the pain I feel,
Alike to my heart being pierced by cold hard steel?
What truly is love?
Is there really a flawless love that gives without reserve?
Humanly impossible,
Is it all really just a bedtime fable?
- Emptiness - 5/23/2005 10:09:00 am
Thursday, May 12, 2005
It's the Hols!
Hmmm... quite sometime since I posted a non-poem post here.... So it's time to bring an end to the drought of ramblings....
Exams are finally over... and this sem, I'm screwed big time... Expected cap for this sem would be around 3.5-3.8... Macroecons couldn't finish, Microecons so so, some parts can't finish too, social work, not exactly well prepared, computing studies, lost 10 marks before the exam even started due to not participating in some stupid forum, and lastly, econometrics, 1 question screwed up cause i dunno how to do... Sigh.... So different from last sem, which was such a breeze... Anyway, more importantly, I'm finally free! For around 3 months at least... Minus the 1 week of incamp SAF reserves training...
I look at myself in the mirror and wonder in amazement at what one year of slacking can do to your body... Whatever little muscle I had, now is tucked away somewhere.... can't be under fat, since I've lost weight since my NS days.... (amazingly)... I think they just decided to go AWOL on me... other than the 6 lumps on my abs, which have decided to unite together to form one big lump.... -_"- To salvage the situation, I've decided to implement night runs... and wow... before I even hit 1 km, I'm panting like there's no tomorrow.... This is pretty serious... considering my in camp training is like just 3 weeks away.... In fact, less than that -_"- Anyway, I don't know whether to hate or love my night jogs... Running from my place to Pandan Resevoir is so painstakingly slow, tiring, and "breath-taking" (literally) given my fitness level, but when I finally reach there, the view is absolutely breath-taking. The cool breeze in my face, the divine peace and quiet, with only the sound of the soft splashing of the water on the rocks, really makes my run worthwhile, totally....
Isn't it amazing how we look forward so much to holidays, only to realise, once it is the hols, that you so much want it to be school term as you are dead bored? I've got 3 months on my hands and I dun even know what to do with them.... Went down to job agency with px and yy to find something to kill off my 3 months 3 days ago, and have yet to receive any call of any kind.... Boredom is totally dreadful.... Anyway, guess what... Who could have believed that someone would name his recruitment agency "Cheeze(something)" Goodness! What kind of name is that? what's worse, when we went in there, it seems more like a private space than a recruitment agency... The guy even keeps a pet something, i think some sort of ferret or rodent, that I never seen before, bigger than a hamster, smaller than a rabbit in his "meeting room".
Lemme see what else vain stuff I can write about here...
- Emptiness - 5/12/2005 12:53:00 am
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
Hmmm....
A poem I wrote to suan my friend
VTEC -- By -Emptiness-
What’s with SIR?
It is just another car.
What about VTEC?
Can it give you a high like crack?
The century sprint,
Under seven point eight?
At the traffic light,
For my Sunny you will wait.
So what’s the big deal,
About fast cars with hot looks?
I’d rather lie in the field,
With a sweet girl with good looks.
- Emptiness - 5/10/2005 08:00:00 pm
Sunday, April 17, 2005
Very dark poem....
Guess that exams just make me in the mood for really dark poetry....
Disclaimer:
Don't blame me if your cheery mood gets spoiled after reading this poem....
You have been warned....
Living on Borrowed Time -- By -Emptiness-
Countless stories, are left untold,
As homeless orphans, perish in the cold.
Countless candles, have flickered and died,
As sickly patients, give up their will to fight.
Countless dreams, have faded to naught,
As young soldiers, by Death’s scythe are caught.
Countless journeys, all left uncompleted --
Destroyed in an instant as they were created.
Pity them,
These poor souls.
They hadn’t the chance,
To experience life whole.
Shower them,
With compassion and love.
A bit of care,
Is the least they deserve.
But spare a moment,
And look into the mirror.
Take time to consider,
And it will all become clearer.
For what is the difference,
Between us and them?
From the very beginning,
We were all condemned.
Peacefully or painfully,
Seventeen, or seventy,
We’ll all turn to dust,
The day we breathe our last,
And after which,
We’ll all be the same.
An urn of dust --
Just another name.
Ever wondered why,
We have to suffer so much?
And asked yourself why,
We were fated to perish as such?
It’s as if we have all,
Committed heinous crimes,
And like death-row convicts,
Are living on borrowed time.
- Emptiness - 4/17/2005 11:12:00 pm
Friday, April 08, 2005
I wonder....
I suddenly had a thought....
How would it be, say, a year from now, when I view my blog, and decide to view the archives? How different would it be then? Would my new entries sound like my past entries? Would they evolve around the same issues? What would be my mindset then? What would be my worries and concerns then? Would my entries be as dark as what they are now?
Would I read the past entries with a sense of bewilderment, wondering whether it is the same person that wrote those entries, wondering, "Is that really me one year ago," with a quizzical look on my face? Maybe I'd be asking myself, "How come I was so silly then? How come I was so immature, so illogical?" Time passes, situations differ, people change...
So many questions....
Life is so unpredictable...
- Emptiness - 4/08/2005 08:00:00 pm
Loved ones...
"What's the difference between a loving someone, and being in love with someone?
If you receive a call at 3am in the morning, the
last person you would want to hear would be your loved one. However, the one you are in love with would be the
first you want to hear."
Something I read from a book in the lib...
- Emptiness - 4/08/2005 07:52:00 pm
Sunday, April 03, 2005
Fate...
Fate has a funny way of screwing me from behind... What I fear most, what I dislike most, what I want to avoid most, fate has a sadistic way of throwing all these things at me, making things happen to me that I try to avoid throughout my life... It seems that it gains pleasure form seeing me in pain, from seeing my heart being torn into pieces... Doesn't it have some other hobbie to keep it occupied? Shit...
I hate fate.
On a lighter note, though I woke up today feelin' damn sian.... I'm feeling a lot better already... Nothing a bit of reckless driving can't cure, as they say... Should have driven faster though....
- Emptiness - 4/03/2005 09:10:00 pm
Friday, April 01, 2005
Death
Death -- by -Emptiness-
My vision grows dim,
I'm drowning though I can swim.
Time has seemed to stop,
Even in seeking death, am I an utter flop?
Should I start to swim?
It'll be too late when they gather around me singing hymns.
Or should I just wait?
Soon I'll be at the pearly gate.
I'm simply tired,
In life, too much have I been hurt.
I want to end this constant fall,
And death it seems, is the solution to it all.
But memories of the past,
Of the happy times that have passed,
And the people I'm leaving behind,
Are holding me back, screaming in my mind.
The burning feeling in my chest --
The scream for air that will never rest,
Is urging me to swim out of this grave.
It seems I'm bonded to life like I'm a slave.
Should I save myself?
Or should I drown myself?
Death, or this living hell?
Only time can tell.
P.S. Deeper meanings...
- Emptiness - 4/01/2005 07:01:00 pm
Thursday, March 31, 2005
True Love
What is true love?
A mutual feeling that lifts you to the clouds above?
I'm sorry, no.
Let me teach you, that you may know.
True love is about being misunderstood,
Though all you do is for her good.
Sorely hated by the one you love,
Enduring pain you don't deserve.
Without complaint,
You suffer silently in pain.
And suppress your utmost desire,
To run to her and confess that you're a liar.
And pretend that you,
Are not hurt when you say 'adieu'.
When deep inside,
The downpour of tears have yet to subside.
I admit that I can't do this,
This love is too painful to exist.
But I can say that what I gave is close to it,
And already, it feels like with a knife, my wrist I slit.
- Emptiness - 3/31/2005 11:32:00 am
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
Delusion
Last Dance -- By -Emptiness-
His longing eyes,
Scanned the misty hall,
Till they stumbled upon,
His lovely doll.
Behold, she stood,
Alone in the crowd,
Her vision transfixed,
Upon him throughout.
Electrifying,
An intense gaze.
Unbridled passion,
Their eyes portray.
The music faded,
The crowd, no more.
The bustling hall,
To them, an empty floor.
Without a word,
He raised his arm.
And stood there waiting,
For her to come.
Captivated,
By his azure eyes.
She gracefully approached,
Her desires disguised.
He took her hand,
And pull her close.
And in the silence,
They assumed their pose.
Then, as if,
By an unspoken cue,
They moved as one,
With pristine skill.
A slow waltz,
As they graced the floor.
Obsessed by the other,
Ignorant to all.
But slowly their dance,
Picked up in pace.
A brisk canter,
Then a frantic race.
They could sense,
The fading night.
The inevitable,
Arrival of light.
The crimson glow,
Crept into the room.
Gradually, she faded,
By light consumed.
The crowded hall,
Now empty and still.
He stood there alone,
Feeling unfulfilled.
How long can lies,
Lead you astray?
How can dreams withstand,
The coming of day?
How long can one,
Live in delusion?
Though the truth hurts,
It’s the only solution.
For how long can someone lie to himself? Maybe the best way is to realise the truth, and accept it... It might be painful.... But the pain is short lived... However, for some people, the pain is too much to bear... That's the curse of the emotional people...
Bubbles will burst,
Dreams will shatter.
Prepare for the worst,
And do not falter.
- Emptiness - 3/29/2005 09:12:00 pm
Sluggish
Is it just me?
I don't get it... Exams are just round the corner, and here I am, with an entire free day, slacking in front of my computer! Don't I have to do some sort of preparation for the exams? But what should I do to prepare? Read the readings for social work? Actually start to listen to the countless computing studies webcasts that I've missed? Or get my ass down to the central library to borrow some economics textbooks to catch up on the stuff I missed when I pon my economics lectures? I can think of so many ways to start studying, but the problem is, my legs are rather slackish now... No strength to get up from my seat.... -_"-
Help me someone! I need to at least start studying!
- Emptiness - 3/29/2005 02:28:00 pm
Saturday, March 26, 2005
痛
痛。。。
真得很痛。。。
我的心碎，
谁能体会？
心给了，收不回。
睡醒了，梦就毁。
失恋的世界，
我总于了解。
爱情就象毒品，
上瘾了怎能戒？
- Emptiness - 3/26/2005 09:12:00 pm
